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Hi loves. It's taken me a long time to write this blog post. I've just been at a loss for words. If you follow me on Instagram, then you already know that we postponed our wedding from October 4th 2020 to October 22nd 2021. I swear I cried everyday leading up to making this call. I’d randomly break out into tears while driving, watching TV, working. You name it - I’ve been a total mess. @chicollophoto is the fiancé of the year for being my rock and keeping me sane despite everything going on.

Everyday I have a different emotion about it.

I was at peace when we made the decision. Relieved, even.

Last week I was excited and looking forward to our 2021 wedding with all the bells and whistles (fingers crossed #COVID doesn’t ruin our fun again).

Now, I am back to feeling the way I did before we made the official decision to postpone - sadness, loss, depression, anxiety.. the list goes on.

A wise friend of mine (who also postponed his wedding) said that we are grieving a loss. This resonated with me and has been helping me make sense of all these emotions.

Why did we postpone?

Ultimately, we just don’t want our guests to feel uncomfortable and we don’t want to put elderly family members at risk. With wedding regulations in CA changing so frequently, it’s just too uncertain to keep our original plans and we don’t know what to expect for this October. As of now, everyone would have to wear a mask and we want to see everyones faces. Those are the memories that will last a lifetime and we cannot imagine a wedding where everyones joy is hidden behind a mask. And the photos.. don’t get me started LOL I refuse to have our wedding photos + video filled with masks, sanitizer, and social distancing. No thanks. Not to mention - Johnny and I didn’t get to have our Bachelor/Bachelorette parties, or a bridal shower, and that just sucks. So the best decision across the board was to postpone. @fawnevents.laura and I have put so many woman hours into planning an absolutely beautiful wedding and I just don’t want to make any compromises - I want this day to be exactly as envisioned and postponing is the best way to have the wedding of our dreams. Stay tuned for 2021 :) #changedittochicollo

PS. Last weekend, I finally got to see a project Iv'e been working on for almost 1 year come to life. My bridesmaids and I headed out to the desert to shoot the new Birdy Grey Satin Campaign!! I am the face of the their new collection - and these dresses are even more beautiful in person. Seeing my bridesmaids in their dresses made me emotional - it was a true sneak peek of what our desert wedding will be like later this year, and I am so excited :)


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